Consistency is Attractive

Consistency is Attractive

John Paul Derryberry

I know exactly what will happen if I text my friends about a problem I'm experiencing. First, they will make sure I'm okay. Second, they will offer solutions in line with my moral compass. Third, they will crack a joke at my expense. I also know what will transpire with my wife if I come to her with a problem. First, she will apologize even though she had nothing to do with it. Second, she will ask a question about how the problem occurred. Third, she will say, " Well, you will figure something out; you always do." And, she will say, "I love you."

Do you know how important this is for my mental and emotional health? I have consistent and predictable support, compassion, and a safety net. These same folks who are my support system have found a way to achieve a rare thing in this world; consistency with their thought process, actions, and interactions with complex topics. It's something rare in this world and becoming more irregular with our leaders.

Wouldn't our society function in a calmer frequency if leaders consistently responded to the problems we face. If, for example, you continually use keeping kids safe as a talking point, you wouldn't suddenly change your tune when it came to keeping kids safe when they're at school because you support the 2nd amendment. I get that it's becoming a complicated issue- keeping rights while keeping children safe. But you should lead with your talking point of keeping kids safe. What's the point of banning books in the name of safety if you won't lift a finger to protect the children's lives from guns. It's an inconsistent line of thinking.

Listen, I know the only way to get a camera on you for 15 seconds as a leader is to yell, scream, and say the world is ending. But, honestly, that's consistently exhausting and not really true. It's a big lie, and many leaders say they are religious, and lying is stated explicitly as a thing that shouldn't happen. Or, they are not religious but have said, I won't lie to you. I promise any leader, just pick like two things and start being consistent at them. I chose compassion and patience. I remind myself to have compassion for people I disagree with and remain patient with people as they learn.

Any leader can pick two healthy concepts and follow them consistently. Try transparency and justice. How about fair and nonjudgemental? Ever think about integrity and curiosity? Just keep a couple and stop changing your answers and opinions as often as the weather changes in the midwest. Who cares if the other side came up with a good idea to keep kids safe as long as it fits your two traits? Go with it. Why this plea? Well, the only thing we seem to be consistent with currently is letting things worsen and not doing anything about it. And, if my support system wasn't making my life better, I would have to think about making some adjustments. Lucky for me, they are consistently impressive. It would be pretty cool to say that about our leaders.