The Pause Before the Moment

The Pause Before The Moment

John Paul Derryberry

I tap my toes on the cement a couple of times before the national anthem plays through the speakers. We are just moments from the starting horn on a 10k, on this blustery spring morning in Clear Lake, Iowa. It's at this moment I decide how I'm going to run this race. I examine a flag blowing in the wind and realize most of the second half of the run will be with wind in my face. It's not going to be a fun run and the decision is made to run a quick first mile while there are buildings blocking the wind and just see how the rest goes. We spend a small amount of time during our life in the moment before the moment, but it has an outsized impact the direction of our life.

Right before we cast our vote, accept a new job, agree to go on a date, sign the contract, say I do, and countless other acts, there is a moment where there are numerous possible outcomes cascading in every direction. Those moments are packed with emotions, both good, bad, confusing, and so much more. And yet this is where life happens, in the choices we make in that slight pause before we make our final choice. It sets in motion how we will interact with the world, strangers, loved ones, and whoever else we come in contact with. 

We control so little of life, but in that quick pause before we make a choice, we have our hands on the wheel. We can make a choice for the greater good, to better as many people around as possible, or to go easy on ourselves. It can often feel like we are bouncing from one moment to next with no time to react and feel like the world is conspiring against us.  I know I have felt this way during certain moments of my life. Yet there is always that pause before we decide what to wear to work, to hit send on the message, or before the purchase giving us a chance to think things through. 

This moment, this wonderful pause in life, is where we have the opportunity to turn our life into a better direction. To achieve something great in life, we have to string enough of these moments into positive choices. The pause may only last a second but it's a brief thought pattern, where we get to decide who we are. Do we include others; do we steal from others when people are not looking; do we care for people who need help, or do we give in to those impulses that we dislike about ourselves. Life isn't about the moments that happen to us; it's about correctly working through the moments before the moment. That's where we will find out who we really are, not from what happens to us, but in the choices we make before making the final choice. It's there, if we are ultimately a good person with good intentions, or someone we don't recognize.