Sunday Night With John: Emotions Matter

The phrase, “Share emotions, emotions matter” has always been a theme for my life and my public speaking.

By explaining what this phrase means to me, I hope you, my audience, can begin to gain a deeper glimpse into what I strive to communicate through my love of public speaking and communicating with others.  As I sit here and reflect, I am amazed at what we can do as human beings.   We have built amazing sky scrappers, we are able to talk with people thousands of miles away through numerous technological gadgets, and we are expanding the limits science and technology daily.   

Yet we are still tied to our emotions daily.  They drive us to decisions constantly that either forces our mood to change or deepens the emotions we will feel.  We often view emotions as a nuisance that is in the way, instead of tool we can use to communicate and grow.  Little kids have no problem sharing their emotions.  They share impulsively and honestly.  As we age and society pressures us to be strong and in control, we are aware our shared emotions may leave us vulnerable to pain. We would rather stuff emotions, than risk that emotional pain and uncertainly, which happens to the “weak.”  We have seen high profile people in our society tumble due to their inability to understand emotional health.  When we give our emotions a chance to breath, we can allow strong emotional health and to lift us up as individuals and communities.

On a more personal level, I can’t count the number of times I’ve made a decision based on how I feel.  Or, have left a situation thinking, why couldn’t find the courage to share how I felt.  I also find it fascinating how we often down play the great moments that leave us happy, excited, and joyful.  Instead, we tend to focus on the moments and things that cause us sadness, anger, and grief.  I have fallen victim to this even though I speak and attempt to live by “Share emotions, emotions matter” on a daily basis.  I made a commitment to myself to choose to share my emotions with those around me and understand that honoring them gives me a strong sense of personal awareness.  This has helped me build my personal and professional relationships through open communication and more importantly, remembering to listen.

If we are going to begin to put a dent into bullying issues, mental health issues, suicide attempts, and other ailments in our personal homes, schools, communities and cities, we have to find a way to start addressing emotional health.  I feel this begins with having an environment that is open to every, and any emotion that is being experienced.  Creating the environment can take time and effort and involve buy in from other members of the community.  In my own life, I strive to create a place where it’s okay to cry ten years after a painful event.  Where it’s okay laugh even in a stressful moment.  Where we can share and attempt to understand other emotions before we rush to judgment. I often say in my talk, we all at some point in life will experience every emotion.  The only difference is the story to how we got to that emotion.  I’m glad I landed on “Share emotions, emotions matter,” because it’s true for all of us.