Sunday Night With John: Going The Distance

It was day three of a week-long hike on the Superior Hiking Trail outside of Duluth, Minnesota. The first two days went off without a hitch and renewed the reason I fell in love with backpacking in the beginning. I had never witnessed the well-kept secret of the incredible beauty of the North Shore. I did not know places of this magnificence existed in the Midwest.  With my wife and our friend in tow, we tamed the trail the first two days and already were talking about the trip being too short.  As we started the third day, the planned longest day at just a shade under 18 miles, we felt good about our trip. We would stop for lunch at Bear Lake, that was rumored to be beautiful, around the nine-mile mark. Then, we would hike to Tettegouche State Park to camp for the night. 

The first half of the day was glorious and Bear Lake was as advertised. We played with the idea of cutting it short for the day and camping on the shores of a secluded oasis where very few have had the privilege to sleep. However, our desire to hit our goal of 60 miles in five days overwhelmed us. We started off, thinking we had a little over four hours left in the day to hike, and began talking about what to make for dinner. Then, we made a minor climb, that zapped our zest for the trail, and our pace slowed. It began to feel as if Tettegouche State Park was actively moving away from us.  Our feet began to ache first, then our calves, then our quads, and, finally, the pain of carrying 30 pounds over rough terrain crept into our lower backs. The trail had worn us down and beaten us into a pulp. We shed a few tears as we openly wondered why we had not reached the park. On different occasions, the three of us thought we had taken our last possible step. Broken down, limping, and looking like a group on its last leg, we finally entered the campgrounds of Tettegouche State Park only to find that there were no camping spots left for the night. 

Dejected, rejected, and defeated, we contemplated how far we would have to hike to reach the next available campsite. We quickly decided there was no way we could accomplish further hiking. We plopped down on our backs to gather ourselves and thought about just sleeping right beneath the campgrounds sign. Laughter erupted from us as the notion sunk in that we had hiked the full 18 miles' distance only to find that the finish line had moved to another location. A metaphor for life had appeared in the middle of our vacation. (I use the term "vacation" loosely because I had to take a "vacation" to be able to hike for five days.  But, hiking for five days is not really a vacation). We often work our tails off for an outcome we want in life, only to see the goal or reward fall through, change, or move. There is no more elegant way to put it than, "rejection sucks." To be told "no", "try again", or "great idea but not right now", can produce some of the toughest moments we have to navigate in life. Mostly, these moments are tough because we worked so hard, pushed through barriers, and knew we deserved a "yes". These moments are tough because we figure that, if we carry 30 pounds on our backs for 18 miles, we deserve to have acamping spot to rest our tired bodies. 

As we complained about our situation, another camper offered to take us up to the main office and explained thatthere were a number of hunting cabins for rent along the trail.  We could find accommodations without having to walk another step!  Rejection turned to sweet, oh sweet relief, as we located a cabin to rent for the night. In addition, we were offered a ride to the cabin and back to the trail. Our driver also allowed us to stop and order a pizza for the night. We had experienced a short-lived rejection, but whether rejection is short or long, it is one of the toughest feelings to overcome. After working so hard to reach a goal and missing, you have to muster the energy to try again, have hope it will be different this time around, and attempt to go the distance. However, it was not hiking that taught me the most about rejection, it was hearing "no", "no", and "no" again and again when I first attempted to be a public speaker. It felt like a daily 18-mile hike to hear that there was no place at the inn for me to rest my weary head. It was a battle to wake up each day and say to myself, do it again, do it again, and do it again. Whether we are facing a long journey through school, attempting to get a book published, trying to land that promotion, or,  just trying to gut out an 18-mile hike, we have to remember that, when the finish line moves on us, the goal is to not say, "I’ve done enough. I deserve this.". The goal is say to yourself that the reward when you finish will just be just that much grander. The goal is to understand that it's not about the rejection. It’s about your ability to go the distance.