SNWJ: Walk Into 2019 Like The Waukon Girl From My Talk

Walk Into 2019 Like The Waukon Girl From My Talk

There are many moments that could capture the core of Chase the Invisible's 2018 year of my public speaking message: 

It could have been the moment when one kid was afraid to share in my breakout session at West Marshall High School in State Center, Iowa, yet another kid whispered, "Say it. This guy is cool." In an hour, I had convinced a teenager that this was a safe place to speak truthfully about life. 

It could have been the moment when the organizer of a storytelling event needed a story with only days before her event, and she reached out to me.

Or, it could have been the email I received from a mom whose son attended my session at Marquette Catholic schools. She said, "My son has never come home and wanted to talk about his emotions, until today. Thank you for the best conversation with my son in forever."

But none of those topped the moment of action by one of my audience members, after my session with the students of Waukon High School. I had just finished presenting my, "Everyone has the power to transform their world" talk and the kids rushed. They always do after this talk because they want to try on the Bumble-Bee transformer costume that I use to illustrate that presentation. There is always one brash student in the crowd who asks if they can try it on, and the doors swing open to twenty kids making the same request. That day, the Waukon students peppered me with questions:

"How long did it take you to make it?"

"Do you really wear it out sometimes?"

"Will you make me one?

"Did you make the costume and then come up with the talk?

I loved answering these questions, but I noticed a young female student twisting her body as she observed the group of kids surrounding me. She lingered, not moving with the traffic heading out nor the throng of students moving towards me. That's why she stood out. It was easy to see she was contemplating her next move.

I continued to answer her classmate's questions, hoping she would summon the bravery to enter the pool of her peers around me. 

She took a couple of steps forward and stopped again. I chuckled as one student attempted to transform but her failure came with a giant laugh, the type of laughter that heals the soul. The questioning look on the hovering-girl's face slowly morphed. Her eyes focused, she adjusted her hair ever slightly, and she leaned forward just enough to produce a shock wave of determination. She carried her self into the group around me on this wave and said,

"Excuse me".

I knelt down to be on her level and said, "Yes?"

"These guys do not know this, but I have been abused, and I'm so happy someone came to our school to talk about it honestly. I see a therapist to help me, but it's awesome that 
you do this. Thank you," she stated. 

I replied, "How brave of you to come to tell me and talk so openly about your issues in front of your peers."

She responded, "I know," smiled and bounded away.

Her peers were stunned. One whispered, "I never knew," and another stated, "That was deep". Suddenly my transformer costume and I were no longer the coolest people in the room. My smile grew three sizes as I watched her walk away in her triumph. 

I knew why she had hesitated to come to speak with me. It's the same reason we all pause to share, chase a dream, or open up. It's because there are a million ways our culture attempts to stifle us from reaching our potential. We become ashamed of our faults, worry about people's reaction, and play it safe out of fear of sticking out and drawing attention to ourselves. Real attention, not social-media-fleeting attention, is the type of attention that sticks with people, the kind of choices that make people take notice for longer than 30 seconds. 

That's bravery, to live a life where people have a full view of us, our strengths, our weaknesses, our troubled pasts, and best memories. It is increasingly easy to scrub away our warts. The right filter and carefully crafted social media post will cover up just about anything these days. Yet here was a young teenager owning her abusive past in front of her peers and admitting she seeks help from a therapist. Honesty always equals bravery. Because we see it so rarely from the people getting the limelight, we can forget it's raw power.  

It looks like the scene I just described -- hesitating, debating in our head, "do I this?" -- and then deciding, knowing there was no reward, no TV show, no instant feedback, that it was worth doing, worth saying. That is bravery, bravery I hope I carry with me to every talk in 2019. Let's all be more honest with ourselves and everyone in our orbit. I hope this little girl knows how her bravery sparked me, because I want to walk into 2019 like my friend from Waukon, Iowa. 

Have a safe and happy new year. I hope 2019 opens up opportunities for growth for you, provides chances to realize your potential.