Fragile

Fragile

John Paul Derryberry

The Big Bang set everything in motion with such force that the universe is still expanding. That's what big events do; they, through their copious amounts of energy, force change on their surroundings that has lasting effects. The energy has no remorse for the destruction it causes or the life it creates; it just exists and radiates out in every direction, influencing everything in its path. And in its wake, conscious beings do their best to understand its causes, its effects, and its energy in a way that allows them to sleep better at night.

A year into the COVID-19 Pandemic, that did for our tiny planet what the Big Bang did for the universe, we are attempting to take stock of what we experienced, what changed, and how we proceed with all this new information. Unfortunately, with events like this, different groups come to many different answers about what all this means. And for the most part, even though we don't want to admit it, most of us are not wrong, while also not being correct either.

Yes, the conclusion to mask up and see people as little as possible showed itself as the sensible path, the path with the least life lost. And, in full disclosure, it was the path I followed. But even that path comes with questions. Like, what type of life are we really living removed from so many we loved?

Others concluded it was a hoax and no worse than the flu. They choose to rebel and gather and keep their quality of life high. This is the path of the individual thinker, the path that proposes, in the grand scheme of things, individual freedom outweighs the group's needs. But this path also comes with questions. Like, what type of life are we really living if our choices kill so many others? If we don't understand that we are a part of society?

Maybe the real lesson, the real power the pandemic has revealed, is how fragile it all is: employment, support systems, social safety net, the economy, individual freedoms, and in fact, life. And we all, out of realizing so much of life is outside of our control, reacted as best we could to a difficult situation. Coming to the realization that life is fragile is never easy on the thought process or the soul. Some feared we would die, others feared loss of independence. Some feared we would kill others, others feared they would lose their job, dreams, and countless other aspects of life. And that fragility spread over our culture much like the energy of the Big Bang. It touched every aspect of life and forced us into difficult decisions.

And that is what has been reinforced for me during this whole year. I'm fragile, but not in the sense that I can't withstand some life heat. I've done that plenty. In the sense that I control so little of life, I must take advantage of the stuff I appreciate in life. The stuff that I enjoy in life, I must not put off. The people I love in life, I must tell them often. And most importantly, for the stuff and people outside of my control that I do not like, I must maintain a level of compassion. For they, too, are fragile, whether they admit it not. How fragile are we? Exponentially, more than we realize, and we would do well not to forget that when the pandemic is behind us.