Sunday Night With John: To Cleveland Browns Or Not To Cleveland Browns?

(This blog was written before the train wreck of bad news for the NFL. I do not condone the actions taken by the players abusing anyone and I do not believe the NFL reacted in a responsible way when put in position to move culture toward understanding that child abuse and domestic violence have no place in our society. I have not yet formed a well thought out opinion about how I will react and interact with NFL moving forward. The blog below is separate from that thought at this time. At some point over this next week I will factor a number of ways I can pressure the NFL into changing their ways)

Raising children is a creative endeavor, an art rather than a science.

Bruno Bettelheim

It’s football season, which means I’m excited for the Cleveland Browns draft in April. I mean, we haven’t been good in a long time.  I think I was 6 and vaguely remember when Bernie Kosar and The Browns losing two years in a row to John Elway and the Denver Broncos. Ok so I more than vaguely remember it.  It’s burned into mind and I was only 6. How could a sporting event have that much sway over me emotionally? I watched the Browns game closely last week as we fell behind by a lot and then came all the way back to tie it. My hope began to swell as I thought maybe; just maybe this team would be different and we would vanquish that team from Pittsburgh. My hopes were crushed again as Pittsburgh kicked a game winning field goal as time expired and the Browns lose again. I’ll admit this time it was with much more gusto than normal, but we lost again, just like we do on most Sundays.

My wife and I have been discussing when it’s a good time to start our family; we both are excited about becoming parents. I believe we are going to take a trip to Europe next summer, one last kid free trip before we begin our family. What does starting a family and my crushed spirit as a Cleveland Browns fan has in common? Well, I’m a Browns fan because; my grandpa, my dad and brother were Browns fans. When I was little that’s all I wanted to do was be like the three coolest guys I knew. Then the thought that popped in my head was do I want my children growing up Cleveland Browns fans?  Do I want my kids to grow up rooting for a team that quite possibly may never be a winner?  I mean they can’t lose forever, can they?

Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three children and no theories.

John Wilmot

I am a Browns fan through and through.  For instance, the only way to have a real conversation with my grandpa was about Cleveland sports. He would sit in his chair and profess about how the Browns were going to do it this year. I would also pretend I was the quarterback for the Browns in my backyard. I went as a Browns player for Halloween on at least one occasion.  My life in the late 80’s and early 90’s where marked by watching the Browns on Sunday. Our dog even had a Browns sweatshirt that he wore for the playoff games in 1988. Then the Browns were moved to Baltimore and became the Ravens, who have one won two super bowls. How in the world of karma is that fair!? How would I explain to my kids, you see we had the Browns, and then they became the Ravens and ended up being good and stayed good? What will my answer be when the simple and wonderful logic of a 7 year old asks, “Why didn’t you just root for the Ravens?” I will have to explain the value of loyalty and hope he or she doesn’t reply, “Well they haven’t really paid you back for staying loyal.”  Losing the Browns took away Sundays for my family. We no longer gathered to watch the game and when they returned in 1999, we felt like we were getting a family member back. Our Cleveland Browns were home and so were our Sunday gatherings.

Perhaps the soundest advice for parents is: Lighten up. People have been raising children for approximately as long as there have been people.

George Will

I continue to have conversations with my brother about how the Browns will do this year and what do we need to turn the corner. Browns have connected my family, just like the Hawkeyes and Minnesota Vikings and the Twins connect my wife’s family. Living in the middle of Iowa City, I have no chance to steer the next little Derryberry away from the Hawkeyes. I’m resigned to the fact that at some point I will be a Hawkeye fan to gain that common experience with my son or daughter. At least I will be used to all the losing from being a Browns fan all these years.  I wouldn’t trade my loyalty for the Brown for the world, but there is an opportunity for me to I tell my child, the Browns are my favorite team but there are other options, you can pick who ever you want to root for. That door is open. Unless they pick that team from Pittsburgh or Baltimore, if that happens I will have to have a sit down talk with them about the horrible choices they are making. The other option is that I nudge and steer my child towards the Browns with gear, pictures, taking pilgrimages to Browns games with my family back in Ohio. Maybe I’ll get lucky and they will be good when my kid is between the ages of 6 and 8. But, who am I kidding, no way that will happen.

“You will either profit by or pay for what your children become. Raise them properly.” 
 Darnell Lamont Walker

Ultimately I know when the kids arrive, I just want it to be healthy and the rest will sort itself out. I want my kid to have choices, to reach for heights that I never achieved.  Who knows maybe being a Browns fan will ultimately keep them grounded, knowing they are a winner, but their team is always a loser.  I just love how fun those Sunday gatherings and Anne’s family Saturday Hawkeye game day gatherings are. I’ll want to share those types of moments with my kids, hopefully wearing the same color jersey and either cheering and or crying together. My dad never allowed us to get too wrapped up into it.  He would say it’s not life or death; it’s just a game. Maybe that was his way of protecting me from all the losing the Browns were doing. He was giving me a shield for when the buzzer sounded it was over, just like a Broadway play, a movie, or a concert. Get wrapped up in the moment and then leave the moment. A lesson I hope to pass on after the Browns win the big game, or lose it.  Here is what I do know. It’s fun being a Browns fan and I hope my kids choose to join me in the land of “next year, is our year.” I also know there are much harder parenting decisions that lay before than will my son or daughter rooting for the Cleveland Browns.  But realizing I will shape this future life profoundly will always have me thinking about situations like this and buying them the coolest Browns gear from birth.

Here we Go Brownies, Here we Go!